I'll admit that I read all of Confederacy of Dunces before looking this up. Ignatious often referred to his pyloric valve closing or having serious problems whenever he was stressed (and that was often). I figured it had something to do with his stomach or having gas build up.
Here is a definition I found:
The pyloric sphincter, or valve, is a strong ring of smooth muscle at the end of the pyloric canal which lets food pass from the stomach to the duodenum. It receives sympathetic innervation from the celiac ganglion.
He used this condition on par with Fred Sanford clutching his chest and yelling for Elisabeth. One of the things I liked about this book is how others reacted to this fool, which was basically not to challenge him (except maybe for his mother). This cast of characters truly fit the title.
I doubt if I'll ever use this conversation, but I'll certainly remember if I hear someone on Grey's Anatomy say it (if I ever watch it, I mean). And if anyone reads this and then reads one of my future novels that has pyloric in it, then you will certainly get the private joke and tribute to Ignatious.
Showing posts with label writers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label writers. Show all posts
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Just a rant about privacy
Ever get the feeling you're being watched?
Pick your nose in the wrong part of the building and your boss will might see you on a video feed. Pull your pants out of your butt in the aisle and K-Mart will know it. Have a quickie in the high rise elevator and Maintenance Man Joe will have a nice ten minute clip to show his friends. Hell, better make sure your blinds have maximum coverage when you're in the apartment alone with a porn. You are being watched.
There was a movie with Will Smith and Gene Hackman called Enemy of the State that offered a glimpse into how scary surveillance and tracking has come (and that was in '98). You can be tracked by your credit card, by your IPASS at tolls, GPS in your phone or in your car. An alibi can be established on every errand you run by time-stamped video. I just got a ticket along with a video of my car going through a red light! And if you happen to be under investigation and all else fails, the IRS already has you by the balls.
Do we care anymore? Are we desensitized? We should be or it might drive us crazy contemplating it all. In the '40's and '50's everyone was made to be so scared of communists that invasions of privacy were the norm. What was it, the McCarthy Red Scare? Our government had a field day prying into the private lives of otherwise normal citizens. Today, the terrorist card can be played as if the government even needed an excuse. Sure, these are private companies that record your movements and track your spending and websites your browse, but that information is out there. Every text, every email. You might hit delete, but it doesn't ever go away.
Facebook - Oh, Lordy Facebook. I'm all for social media. I like Facebook for the mere fact that it's like an address book that everyone else keeps up to date for you. But kids these days don't seem to want privacy. They want everything to be known. GPS doesn't have to track them, they'll tell you right on FB that they're going to Starbucks. They'll tell you their kids have a cold. They'll post a picture of themselves, or what's worse - YOU, drunk at the party, hanging off the ceiling fan in your underwear. Good luck at your next interview. And then it will be there for as long as the Internet is in existence.
I'm trying to be an author; a successful author. And I had a rather extroverted life in New Orleans, but thankfully, that was in the late '80 and 90's before YouTube. If I become a household name, I worry that something might surface because I have a feeling it is out there; a picture, a video, an arrest warrant (just kidding), waiting to embarrass the hell out of me.
And finally, in playing devil's advocate, the one thing I can rationalize is that there are so many people to keep track of, who cares if Joe Blow knows you rent romantic comedies on the weekend? At least those that need to be watched, probably are.
Pick your nose in the wrong part of the building and your boss will might see you on a video feed. Pull your pants out of your butt in the aisle and K-Mart will know it. Have a quickie in the high rise elevator and Maintenance Man Joe will have a nice ten minute clip to show his friends. Hell, better make sure your blinds have maximum coverage when you're in the apartment alone with a porn. You are being watched.
There was a movie with Will Smith and Gene Hackman called Enemy of the State that offered a glimpse into how scary surveillance and tracking has come (and that was in '98). You can be tracked by your credit card, by your IPASS at tolls, GPS in your phone or in your car. An alibi can be established on every errand you run by time-stamped video. I just got a ticket along with a video of my car going through a red light! And if you happen to be under investigation and all else fails, the IRS already has you by the balls.
Do we care anymore? Are we desensitized? We should be or it might drive us crazy contemplating it all. In the '40's and '50's everyone was made to be so scared of communists that invasions of privacy were the norm. What was it, the McCarthy Red Scare? Our government had a field day prying into the private lives of otherwise normal citizens. Today, the terrorist card can be played as if the government even needed an excuse. Sure, these are private companies that record your movements and track your spending and websites your browse, but that information is out there. Every text, every email. You might hit delete, but it doesn't ever go away.
Facebook - Oh, Lordy Facebook. I'm all for social media. I like Facebook for the mere fact that it's like an address book that everyone else keeps up to date for you. But kids these days don't seem to want privacy. They want everything to be known. GPS doesn't have to track them, they'll tell you right on FB that they're going to Starbucks. They'll tell you their kids have a cold. They'll post a picture of themselves, or what's worse - YOU, drunk at the party, hanging off the ceiling fan in your underwear. Good luck at your next interview. And then it will be there for as long as the Internet is in existence.
I'm trying to be an author; a successful author. And I had a rather extroverted life in New Orleans, but thankfully, that was in the late '80 and 90's before YouTube. If I become a household name, I worry that something might surface because I have a feeling it is out there; a picture, a video, an arrest warrant (just kidding), waiting to embarrass the hell out of me.
And finally, in playing devil's advocate, the one thing I can rationalize is that there are so many people to keep track of, who cares if Joe Blow knows you rent romantic comedies on the weekend? At least those that need to be watched, probably are.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
How I got my agent
I guess it's okay to put this out there with no risk of a jinx (I shiver as I write this).
I have finally, after years of searching, signed with agents Al Longden and Cynthia Manson, who will share in my representation. It was a long, angst-ridden path, as many aspiring writers are aware.
It started when I saw the profile of an author on the International Thriller Writers website. He listed Cynthia Manson as his agent, so I did quite a bit research to find her email because she does not have a website or advertise. She responded to my email favorably, but was interested in how I found her. I hadn't run across an agent like this before, one that didn't have a big internet presence, which I thought was fantastic.
My contacting her must have been a timing issue. As luck would have it, she was interested in the full manuscript. I waited patiently until she sent an email regretfully turning down the project, but actually wanted to talk about it over the phone! This in itself was an amazing opportunity. We spoke for twenty minutes about why she didn't want to take on the manuscript even though she liked it. Through this we collaborated on a story that would take place during Hurricane Katrina.
Against the advice of others, I took on this task and within six months had a manuscript prepared; not just because I had an agent's attention, but because this novel was labor of love. It was amazing to write and I enjoyed every minute of it. I eagerly sent it off to Ms. Manson, who then unexpectedly rejected it (insert dissappointing cartoon music). But, I couldn't blame her if I didn't write the book she was looking for.
I knew this novel was going to be the one. I felt it in my bones. She graciously suggested that I sent it to her collegue Al Longden, which I did. She suggested if he liked it, they could possibly share the duties in representation.
Mr. Longden loved it.
I spoke to each of them again in that highly coveted call regarding representation; glad that they couldn't see my happy dance - the type seen after one scores a touchdown. Now, the leg of my journey begins...
I have finally, after years of searching, signed with agents Al Longden and Cynthia Manson, who will share in my representation. It was a long, angst-ridden path, as many aspiring writers are aware.
It started when I saw the profile of an author on the International Thriller Writers website. He listed Cynthia Manson as his agent, so I did quite a bit research to find her email because she does not have a website or advertise. She responded to my email favorably, but was interested in how I found her. I hadn't run across an agent like this before, one that didn't have a big internet presence, which I thought was fantastic.
My contacting her must have been a timing issue. As luck would have it, she was interested in the full manuscript. I waited patiently until she sent an email regretfully turning down the project, but actually wanted to talk about it over the phone! This in itself was an amazing opportunity. We spoke for twenty minutes about why she didn't want to take on the manuscript even though she liked it. Through this we collaborated on a story that would take place during Hurricane Katrina.
Against the advice of others, I took on this task and within six months had a manuscript prepared; not just because I had an agent's attention, but because this novel was labor of love. It was amazing to write and I enjoyed every minute of it. I eagerly sent it off to Ms. Manson, who then unexpectedly rejected it (insert dissappointing cartoon music). But, I couldn't blame her if I didn't write the book she was looking for.
I knew this novel was going to be the one. I felt it in my bones. She graciously suggested that I sent it to her collegue Al Longden, which I did. She suggested if he liked it, they could possibly share the duties in representation.
Mr. Longden loved it.
I spoke to each of them again in that highly coveted call regarding representation; glad that they couldn't see my happy dance - the type seen after one scores a touchdown. Now, the leg of my journey begins...
Friday, March 25, 2011
How do you get your ideas?
…Is a question many people ask, writers or not. Plus, I'm sure every writer worth their blog has posted something along these lines, but if this helps anyone out there, then its worth it to me.
I was drinking (a lot) the other night with a writer friend and he was curious about my process because he is only half way into his first book, whereas I have a couple collecting dust.
Getting the idea is pretty easy because everyone can come up with a cool storyline. I told my friend that what works for me is after you know what your story is about you need to create characters that you believe to be real.
And then it’s as simple as this; the world gets created as your character does what they need to do. Ex: he needs to borrow money from a loan shark, then you create that loan shark and his environment. There’s a chapter.
The world gets bigger and more complicated and before you know it, these characters are deciding things for themselves and taking the story in a direction you would have never known. If your characters are well developed and deep, then how can they be predictable?
As long as you don’t lose sight of your final goal, you can stay on track. Imagine a line that represents your story from start to finish. Don’t let your tangents run too far off of the line. Always work your way back to that line and you won’t get lost.
The alcohol probably didn’t help me explain it, but this is what works for me and I’m sure every writer has their own process. Good luck to millions of writers who read this.
I was drinking (a lot) the other night with a writer friend and he was curious about my process because he is only half way into his first book, whereas I have a couple collecting dust.
Getting the idea is pretty easy because everyone can come up with a cool storyline. I told my friend that what works for me is after you know what your story is about you need to create characters that you believe to be real.
And then it’s as simple as this; the world gets created as your character does what they need to do. Ex: he needs to borrow money from a loan shark, then you create that loan shark and his environment. There’s a chapter.
The world gets bigger and more complicated and before you know it, these characters are deciding things for themselves and taking the story in a direction you would have never known. If your characters are well developed and deep, then how can they be predictable?
As long as you don’t lose sight of your final goal, you can stay on track. Imagine a line that represents your story from start to finish. Don’t let your tangents run too far off of the line. Always work your way back to that line and you won’t get lost.
The alcohol probably didn’t help me explain it, but this is what works for me and I’m sure every writer has their own process. Good luck to millions of writers who read this.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Progress on Katrina Novel
So, in a quick nutshell, a big time agent is interested in a thriller that takes place during Katrina that I am currently writing. My problem had been getting a cop that had gone through it, so I could be accurate. The NOPD has been dragging their heals in getting me a source.
But, to hell with waiting. What I’ve found is better. I found someone (not a cop) that has accounts of the days before and after Katrina that is pure gold (from a writer’s perspective). I don’t want to glorify that horrible experience or make light having lost the home I grew up in in the flood, but his stories are incredible.
What I’m excited about is this fictional story that is taking shape during the flood. It’s basically about a crime that is being covered up by Katrina and the protagonist takes a heart wrenching, soul-searching journey in trying to solve this crime. I’m not half way done and yet, I’m eager to read the end result (and I’m the writer).
I just sent off the first 100 pages to this agent and I’m waiting for her response. If she poo-poo’s it, I’ll be very disappointed, but I won’t give up. I know deep down that this book is meant for big things.
I don’t want to give my source’s name or occupation just yet. I’m conversing with him with questions via email and hopefully, I’ll get to meet him soon.
So, being a couple of days before New Year’s, I hope everyone has a happy and safe one.
But, to hell with waiting. What I’ve found is better. I found someone (not a cop) that has accounts of the days before and after Katrina that is pure gold (from a writer’s perspective). I don’t want to glorify that horrible experience or make light having lost the home I grew up in in the flood, but his stories are incredible.
What I’m excited about is this fictional story that is taking shape during the flood. It’s basically about a crime that is being covered up by Katrina and the protagonist takes a heart wrenching, soul-searching journey in trying to solve this crime. I’m not half way done and yet, I’m eager to read the end result (and I’m the writer).
I just sent off the first 100 pages to this agent and I’m waiting for her response. If she poo-poo’s it, I’ll be very disappointed, but I won’t give up. I know deep down that this book is meant for big things.
I don’t want to give my source’s name or occupation just yet. I’m conversing with him with questions via email and hopefully, I’ll get to meet him soon.
So, being a couple of days before New Year’s, I hope everyone has a happy and safe one.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Backspace Conference
It was an amazing New York trip. I'd like to thank my New Orleans connection for the free accommodations and general hostess-ness.
From losing a piece of my molar on a delicious bagel to having the best fried chicken a Korean restaurant could ever produce, I had a great time. Oh, wait - I went there to snag an agent or at least learn a few things.
What did I learn and in the order I learned them?
1. NY cab drivers can navigate within an atom's length of other cars as well as pedestrian's knees.
2. There's a slight price difference in food.
3. The hotel doormen are trained by Navy Seals.
4. The Backspace agents were informative, brutal, nice, sincere and brutal.
5. I needed brutality.
6. The most well-hidden restaurants are the most crowded.
7. Don't walk slow.
8. Don't sleep on an air mattress with a leak.
9. With a hangover.
10. The fellow writers at the conference are the best (you know who you are).
11. All Indian food is not hot nor gives you the runs (Whew).
12. Bagels can crack teeth (it wasn't the bagel's fault).
13. There are black squirrels - yes, there are.
14. Baby's can projectile vomit (but missed me - whew).
15. It was all worth it.
I plan to fix some things and query my other projects to a few of the agents I met and I will let my many readers know who said what and was the most brutal.
From losing a piece of my molar on a delicious bagel to having the best fried chicken a Korean restaurant could ever produce, I had a great time. Oh, wait - I went there to snag an agent or at least learn a few things.
What did I learn and in the order I learned them?
1. NY cab drivers can navigate within an atom's length of other cars as well as pedestrian's knees.
2. There's a slight price difference in food.
3. The hotel doormen are trained by Navy Seals.
4. The Backspace agents were informative, brutal, nice, sincere and brutal.
5. I needed brutality.
6. The most well-hidden restaurants are the most crowded.
7. Don't walk slow.
8. Don't sleep on an air mattress with a leak.
9. With a hangover.
10. The fellow writers at the conference are the best (you know who you are).
11. All Indian food is not hot nor gives you the runs (Whew).
12. Bagels can crack teeth (it wasn't the bagel's fault).
13. There are black squirrels - yes, there are.
14. Baby's can projectile vomit (but missed me - whew).
15. It was all worth it.
I plan to fix some things and query my other projects to a few of the agents I met and I will let my many readers know who said what and was the most brutal.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Literary Speed Bumps
Okay, so I'm still getting published in ebook format, but not print - unless my sales are awesome and they chance their mind. In the meantime, I need an agent to try to sell my books to other publishers for me and the first step in doing something positive towards that goal was taken away from me this week.
I was accepted and paid in advance to go the PEN TO PRESS RETREAT in New Orleans, my hometown, where a small group of writers would get instruction on how to pitch to agents and editors from established well known authors and at the end of the retreat, we would get to pitch to these agents face to face.
I knew this was the way to go as the "query letter" is just so - so blah and generic and "one in a million" that they receive and reject.
The CEO of Medallion Press, the publisher that is supporting my upcoming ebook is a keynote speaker, so I was going to meet her. I was going to visit family and friends and my birthday falls on the Saturday of the last day of the retreat. New Orleans, my birthday, Saturday night - are you kidding! Anticipating this trip was probably the first time I had been this excited about anything since my wedding ten years ago.
Then, it happened, but I don't want to speak about it. If you remember when Lennon was shot, it was because the shooter wanted to be famous, so it came to be that the shooter's name was never to be spoken (although everyone still knows his name). I want to treat this situation like that. The person that screwed me will never be spoken of publicly.
But, you get the drift. I was screwed over and had to cancel my plans a week before I was to leave. Compared to some, I have no right to bitch as I lead a pretty good life, but even so, everyone has to deal with disappointment and those like me, the "bright side" people, will go on and continue to smile. As for the pessimists? I can't speak for them, as I don't know how that feels.
I will find another conference to attend and as for this retreat? There's always next year!
I was accepted and paid in advance to go the PEN TO PRESS RETREAT in New Orleans, my hometown, where a small group of writers would get instruction on how to pitch to agents and editors from established well known authors and at the end of the retreat, we would get to pitch to these agents face to face.
I knew this was the way to go as the "query letter" is just so - so blah and generic and "one in a million" that they receive and reject.
The CEO of Medallion Press, the publisher that is supporting my upcoming ebook is a keynote speaker, so I was going to meet her. I was going to visit family and friends and my birthday falls on the Saturday of the last day of the retreat. New Orleans, my birthday, Saturday night - are you kidding! Anticipating this trip was probably the first time I had been this excited about anything since my wedding ten years ago.
Then, it happened, but I don't want to speak about it. If you remember when Lennon was shot, it was because the shooter wanted to be famous, so it came to be that the shooter's name was never to be spoken (although everyone still knows his name). I want to treat this situation like that. The person that screwed me will never be spoken of publicly.
But, you get the drift. I was screwed over and had to cancel my plans a week before I was to leave. Compared to some, I have no right to bitch as I lead a pretty good life, but even so, everyone has to deal with disappointment and those like me, the "bright side" people, will go on and continue to smile. As for the pessimists? I can't speak for them, as I don't know how that feels.
I will find another conference to attend and as for this retreat? There's always next year!
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